David Varì
"But why the hell do I have to prove to be a good mother?". Constance, 40 years or so, says in an ironic way, but the fact that her motherhood is always discussed, scanned and found to start to get pretty irritating. The "problem" is that his daughter Alice, just two years old, has two mothers of "mammaCo" MammaMia and "mom and mom Constance Morena. They are a family
"rainbow" them. Omogenitoriali one of many families living in this country and that this same country when the war is not simply ignore it. The institutions of the country though. This
omogenitoriali myriad of family groups scattered throughout Italy, has neighbors the house and colleagues have to deal with the teachers of their children and their parents of their classmates. In short, a social network, just like any other Italian families. A network that not only ignores their situations but, in most cases, we live with serenity, "When Alice was born the neighbors filled with gifts: baby cot, clothes, games ...». So
the inviolability of the so-called natural family - mother, father and son - exists only in the words of any politician in search of holiness or, at most, a few entratura in the Vatican? "Certainly homophobia exists in the real country - said Constance - except that in the face of direct knowledge the phenomenon and before the recognition of our normal every injury seems to disappear. " Morena and Alice Constance had two years ago. "We went to Belgium and we did the IVF. Indeed, it is my companion, who made it, she is the biological mother. "
One trick that due to law 40, has cost them tens of thousands of euro. "The fact is that we wanted very much Alice." At least this should be all agreed that the hardships faced by a couple omogenitoriale to have a child are so hard and long that one can never doubt their desire to be parents.
Yet even they, who are now living a peaceful life and fully integrated - a normal life like Constance repeated several times - had to face prejudice. Especially with their own prejudices: "When I found out as a lesbian - said Constance yet - I have ruled out any possibility of becoming mother. It was not something thought was an automatic thought. " Morena
Then came the love that has brought together an irrepressible desire for motherhood. "I was faced with a question that I had not really ever post. With the passage of time have been dragged from her gentle determination and I knew that I wanted to be a mother. " Morena
Then she got pregnant and Constance had "accompanied" for nine months. Views gynecologist, ultrasound, and finally delivery. Of course, Alice and Morena, especially the first few months have created their own little world and inviolable. Quell'osmosi physical, almost feral, that is created between mother and infant. "She has kept it in her womb for nine months, nursed, it is normal to be so. But I've been waiting calmly and now, two years later, I am mother to the same level. " A mother at the same level, yes, but not for the law. She, Constance, to the Italian state has no right and no connection in relation to her daughter.
than trying to explain to the child that State tried to tell her that Constance is not his mother. Other than defending the right of the child. It is for this claim
law yesterday, the Rainbow Association found itself in Rome at a conference entitled quite explicit: "The children of couples ghost ghost." 'It is well known, the ghosts never get tired - says the president, Joseph The Delphi - turn and turn over, sleepless, looking for peace and serenity. So we do and do it until we will be welcomed into the community of the living, of those rights. " And the conference was an opportunity to take stock of three years. After all children with at least one gay parent are about 100 thousand. A number that can not be ignored and whose composition is very diverse.
Chiara Lalli, bioethicist at the University of Rome La Sapienza, prepare enriched with a volume of stories he experienced gay parents: "The thing that leaps to the eye is the" normality "of these families. I spoke directly with children and none of them lives difficulty or discomfort due to the gender of their parents. The social context is clear: the school is able to integrate effortlessly. Confirmation that the fundamental fact of parenthood is the affection, love. "
Nothing less so than a pair of heterosexual parents. In fact, maybe more. The only problem, therefore, is given by: "If the biological parent should fail, the child is an orphan. There is no law that protects the child from this very serious and painful injustice. "
But there are those who persist in using the "child protection" as a weapon to throw against the possibility that gay couples can adopt: uneven growth and lack of gender shape, detractors continue to repeat. Certainly, though, there are only studies of the major research institutes. Among these, the American Psychological Association: "Under conditions similar socio-economic, children raised by same-sex couples are similar to those raised by opposite-sex couples in terms of mental and physical health." Moreover, generations of Italians have grown since the only reference to gender women: mothers, grandmothers, aunts and so on. There were also
Constance and Morena at the conference yesterday: "Our daughter - admits, smiling Costanza - is straight, you already understand. Ok, accept it for what it is anyway. "
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